I apologize for not posting lately. This is largely due to the fact that I have been out of town this week. I got the great opportunity to go and serve as a leader in my youth group as we went away to Tennessee for church camp. Now, this is not my first time going to camp with a youth group. This was, however, my first Student Life Camp, and honestly the first camp I'd been to in several years.
My time in Tennessee did something to me. I can say in all honesty that I arrived at camp carrying some things and left those burdens behind as we drove off. In the same way, I arrived at camp empty handed in certain aspects of my life and left camp filled and satisfied.
Now, if you're familiar with church events and church camps in particular then you might understand the phrase "camp high". Camp is meant to be an emotional experience that occurs in a new place, hopefully a closed off place where distractions are set aside. In many ways, camp is a spiritual sanctuary. Kids feel something during camp that they probably don't feel during their normal or typical church time. And so often, they get latched onto those feelings and have an emotionally inspired experience that is commonly called "camp high". They become addicted to those feelings and are drawn to the atmosphere that camp provides.
There is a problem with camp high, though. It doesn't last. We will get caught up in the emotion of worship and the thrill of having thousands of other people singing with us, and being in a place surrounded by our youth group friends 24/7 without outside distractions that we allow our thrill to generate from our surroundings and the atmosphere around us. The truth, however, is that true and genuine change must occur inside us, not by the energy outside of us.
My prayer for my youth group is that they would not fall victim to the camp high. I pray against the possibility of days after being home and away from the camp atmosphere they "lose" those feelings. I pray that the messages that were brought before them were convicting, inspired change, and that they would act on them. I pray that camp changed them on a deep level, not made them feel good on a surface emotional level.
In fact, that is also my prayer for myself. I fought a lot with myself at camp this week. I also wrestled with truths that God was throwing in my face. Camp, for me, was not about learning new things, but about re-sparking that original sense of awe and amazement at what God has done for me. Camp was about falling in love with Jesus again; not just serving Him because I should.
Camp high is an ever-present threat. It would be so easy to allow myself to get caught up in the awesomeness of the week and slowly slip back into old patterns and thought processes that drew me away from closeness to God and His righteousness as camp became more of a distant memory. I wrestle against myself in sticking to the path that I know is the good road and the only path to abundant life. I may fall from time to time, but God has grace, knowing my heart and my desire to know Him better.
I want to see a changed lifestyle in me. And I know that this kind of change must happen deep inside me; I cannot rely on an emotional high to carry me through the trials and conflicts of life. The focus of the camp was on being audacious. For me, it was about being amazed. In love again. This is my prayer and the focus of my heart.
Satan has held me down in many areas of my life for way too long. I have not held up resistance or fought back for the ground I lost to him. This...is a rally call for my soul. I am back. I am changed. And I am willing to take the fight to the gates of Hell to snatch back what I so easily surrendered before: my passion and genuine love for the God that gave up everything for me.
This is a new season in my life. A new era. May God use this new man however He sees fit.
